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| − | Gerda's trip was a very difficult one because The rope sloped nearly down to the ground. According to the text ," the door was so low that there family had to in on their hands and knees when they went in and out." this shows how Gerda's trip was a very difficult one
| + | The main characters in the story were the stedfast tin soldier and the boy receiving the tin soldier. The boy receiving the tin soldier and the steadfast tin soldier were the first we saw in the beginning and the most acting. According to the text," the stedfast tin soldier was the first we saw in the story, the most acting, and the most talking about." This shows who the main characters are and why they are the main characters of the whole story. |
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| − | Gerda's trip was a very difficult one because The rope sloped nearly down to the ground.
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| − | ***Edited for capitalization and clarity: Gerda's trip was a very difficult one because the rope sloped nearly down to the ground.
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| − | ***Don't capitalize "the." Also, can you try to change the second part of the sentence to make it clearer (not sure what you mean about the rope)?
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| − | <br>According to the text ," the door was so low that there family had to in on their hands and knees when they went in and out."
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| − | ***Edited for quotation mark (spacing) and capitalization: According to the text, "The door was so low that their family had to in on their hands and knees when they went in and out."
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| − | ***Correct the spacing around quotation marks. Also, make sure you copied the quote correctly.
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| − | <br>this shows how Gerda's trip was a very difficult one
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| − | ***Edited for capitalization and punctuation: This shows how Gerda's trip was a very difficult one.
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| − | ***Capitalize the first word in a sentence. Add a period at the end.
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| − | '''Final Edited Version:
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| − | Gerda's trip was a very difficult one because the rope sloped nearly down to the ground. According to the text, "The door was so low that their family had to in on their hands and knees when they went in and out." This shows how Gerda's trip was a very difficult one.
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| − | ***Please pay more attention to your writing (small grammatical mistakes). Focus on correcting the spacing around quotation marks.
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| − | Edited by Ashley Leung
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Revision as of 01:13, 12 May 2020
Pala's Writing Page
The main characters in the story were the stedfast tin soldier and the boy receiving the tin soldier. The boy receiving the tin soldier and the steadfast tin soldier were the first we saw in the beginning and the most acting. According to the text," the stedfast tin soldier was the first we saw in the story, the most acting, and the most talking about." This shows who the main characters are and why they are the main characters of the whole story.
