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| | '''Meku's Writing Page''' | | '''Meku's Writing Page''' |
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| − | I can help improve the earth is by using a reusable bag instead of plastic bags. I could also try not to waste electricity by turning off the lights when no one is in the room. I could save water by turning off the water when I am brushing my teeth. The article says 15 billion trees are cut down every year so I could plant trees. I could also ask my family members to help me plant trees and clean the Neboirhood. These are some ways I can help improve the earth.
| + | What happened to the research participants during the study is that the researchers found that there neurons repeatedly turned on and off to lower blood pressure. This is to let cerebrospinal fluid (CSF)wash through the participants' brains during non-REM sleep, the deepest part of the sleep cycle. The CSF also maintains a safe amount of pressure in the brain. CSF is a fluid that cleans your brain removing harmful waste proteins. The researchers also don’t know how the brain waves, blood flow, and CSF coordinate so perfectly. |
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| − | I can help improve the earth is by using a reusable bag instead of plastic bags.
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| − | ***Good!
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| − | <br> I could also try not to waste electricity by turning off the lights when no one is in the room.
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| − | ***Edited for fluidity and vocabulary: I could also conserve electricity by turning off the lights when no one is in the room.
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| − | ***You can use "conserve" instead of "try not to waste." More concise.
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| − | <br>I could save water by turning off the water when I am brushing my teeth.
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| − | ***Good!
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| − | <br>The article says 15 billion trees are cut down every year so I could plant trees.
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| − | ***Edited for clarity and comma: According to the article, 15 billion trees are cut down every year, so I could help plant trees.
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| − | ***If you aren't quoting directly, then avoid using "say." Comma before "so" since the following phrase is an independent clause.
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| − | <br>I could also ask my family members to help me plant trees and clean the Neboirhood.
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| − | ***Edited for spelling: I could also ask my family members to help me plant trees and clean the neighborhood.
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| − | ***Neighborhood is misspelled.
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| − | <br>These are some ways I can help improve the earth.
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| − | ***Good!
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| − | '''Final Edited Version:
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| − | I can help improve the earth is by using a reusable bag instead of plastic bags. I could also conserve electricity by turning off the lights when no one is in the room. I could save water by turning off the water when I am brushing my teeth. According to the article, 15 billion trees are cut down every year, so I could help plant trees. I could also ask my family members to help me plant trees and clean the neighborhood. These are some ways I can help improve the earth.
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| − | ***Overall, good job! Please work on your commas and spelling!
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| − | Edited by Ashley Leung
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Revision as of 00:23, 27 April 2020
Meku's Writing Page
What happened to the research participants during the study is that the researchers found that there neurons repeatedly turned on and off to lower blood pressure. This is to let cerebrospinal fluid (CSF)wash through the participants' brains during non-REM sleep, the deepest part of the sleep cycle. The CSF also maintains a safe amount of pressure in the brain. CSF is a fluid that cleans your brain removing harmful waste proteins. The researchers also don’t know how the brain waves, blood flow, and CSF coordinate so perfectly.
