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Trump Plans
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President Trump is taking back Obama’s climate rule and was announced to lift some restrictions on greenhouse gases from the coal power plants. In addition to this, Trump also releases more land for drilling for oils. This will disturb the life of the wildlife there and their habitat. Also releasing more carbon dioxide will cause more climate changes and the amount of carbon released kept increasing. 
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https://news.nationalgeographic.com/2017/03/how-trump-is-changing-science-environment/
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Equal Spaces
 
Equal Spaces
  

Revision as of 22:49, 6 December 2018

Trump Plans

President Trump is taking back Obama’s climate rule and was announced to lift some restrictions on greenhouse gases from the coal power plants. In addition to this, Trump also releases more land for drilling for oils. This will disturb the life of the wildlife there and their habitat. Also releasing more carbon dioxide will cause more climate changes and the amount of carbon released kept increasing. https://news.nationalgeographic.com/2017/03/how-trump-is-changing-science-environment/



Equal Spaces 

Having equal living space for both wild animals and humans would be nice. Human populations kept increasing and taking up more living spaces. Which make it hard for the wildlife so scientists are now trying to create area where human and wildlife can live. However, due to the rapid increase in the human population it is challenging to attempt. But now scientists are experimenting more possible way for the wildlife to bond with the urban area.

https://elifesciences.org/articles/41348

Equal Spaces


Having equal living space for both wild animals and humans would be nice.

      • Saying "would be nice" is an opinion. Instead, try: Wild animals and humans do not currently share equal living space.


Human populations kept increasing and taking up more living spaces.

      • "Kept increasing" should be switched to the active form--"Continue to increase."
      • "taking" should be switched to "take."
      • "Spaces" shouldn't be plural in this instance.
      • Corrected sentence: Human populations continue to increase and take up more living space.


Which make it hard for the wildlife so scientists are now trying to create area where human and wildlife can live.

      • "Which" should be replaced with "this."
      • "Make" needs to be "makes."
      • There should be a comma after "wildlife."
      • A better substitute for "area" in this instance is "space."
      • I would include the world "both" to better express the shared space.
      • Corrected sentence: This makes it hard for wildlife, so scientists are now trying to create space where both humans and wildlife can live.


However, due to the rapid increase in the human population it is challenging to attempt.

      • There should be a comma after the word "population."
      • Corrected sentence: However, due to the rapid increase in the human population, it is challenging to attempt.


But now scientists are experimenting more possible way for the wildlife to bond with the urban area.

      • The word "but" should not be used to begin a sentence.
      • Rather than "now scientists are experimenting," try "scientist are now experimenting."
      • You should say "experimenting with"
      • "Way" needs to be pluralized.
      • Corrected sentence: Scientists are now experimenting with more possible ways for the wildlife to bond with the urban area.


https://elifesciences.org/articles/41348

Equal Spaces
Wild animals and humans do not currently share equal living space. Human populations continue to increase and take up more living space. This makes it hard for wildlife, so scientists are now trying to create space where both humans and wildlife can live. However, due to the rapid increase in the human population, it is challenging to attempt. Scientists are now experimenting with more possible ways for the wildlife to bond with the urban area.
https://elifesciences.org/articles/41348

Edited by: Brittni Shoaf


Survival 

Bengal tigers are now endangered as many people began to hunt them down. First Bengal tiger are a threat for the village people so many villagers began to kill them for safety. At the same time the tigers are hunted down for their bone for China for traditional medicine. In the early 1900s the population of the tigers dropped from 100,000 to 4,000 today. If nothing is done to save the Bengal tigers they could go extinct in the near future.

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2018/11/pirates-are-killing-tigers/


Survival

      • This title doesn't give an idea as to what the article is about. Try "Bengal Tigers are Headed for Extinction."


Bengal tigers are now endangered as many people began to hunt them down.

      • "Began" should be replaced with "have begun."
      • Corrected sentence: Bengal tigers are now endangered as many people have begun to hunt them down.


First Bengal tiger are a threat for the village people so many villagers began to kill them for safety.

      • The word "first" can be dropped.
      • "Threat for the village people" should instead be "threat to the village people."
      • There should be a comma between the two clauses.
      • Rather than say "began to kill," I would make this sound like it is happening right now by saying "are killing."
      • Corrected sentence: Bengal tigers are a threat to the village people, so many villagers are killing them for safety.


At the same time the tigers are hunted down for their bone for China for traditional medicine.

      • There needs to be a comma after "At the same time."
      • There are too many "for"s here. Instead of saying "for China for traditional medicine," I would say "to be used in Chinese traditional medicine."
      • Corrected sentence: At the same time, the tigers are hunted down for their bone to be used in Chinese traditional medicine.


In the early 1900s the population of the tigers dropped from 100,000 to 4,000 today.

      • This sentence is a bit confusing and just needs some rewording. Try saying: The tiger population has dropped from 100,000 in the early 1900s to just 4,000 today.


If nothing is done to save the Bengal tigers they could go extinct in the near future.

      • A Comma is needed after "tigers."
      • Corrected sentence: If nothing is done to save the Bengal tigers, they could go extinct in the near future.

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2018/11/pirates-are-killing-tigers/

Bengal Tigers are Headed for Extinction
Bengal tigers are now endangered as many people have begun to hunt them down. Bengal tigers are a threat to the village people, so many villagers are killing them for safety. At the same time, the tigers are hunted down for their bone to be used in Chinese traditional medicine. The tiger population has dropped from 100,000 in the early 1900s to just 4,000 today. If nothing is done to save the Bengal tigers, they could go extinct in the near future.
https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2018/11/pirates-are-killing-tigers/

Edited by: Brittni Shoaf

Black Friday Event!

After Thanksgiving is the Black Friday sale that everyone look forward to. But little does anyone know how this can cause pollution. It is proved that online shopping can released more carbon than buying on foot. Due to shipping and fast transportation, many carbon are released into the air. Also clothing can cause more pollution as well. Buying new clothes will increase more textile waste. Overall shopping is enjoyable but be cautious of what you might be releasing in the atmosphere. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/11/how-black-friday-cyber-monday-impacts-environment/

Black Friday Event!

      • This title doesn't provide too much insight about the article. I would switch it for something like "The Environmental Effects of Black Friday."


After Thanksgiving is the Black Friday sale that everyone look forward to.

      • I would be more specific about when this sale occurs.
      • "Look" should have an "s" at the end.
      • Corrected sentence: The day after Thanksgiving is the Black Friday sale that everyone looks forward to.


But little does anyone know how this can cause pollution.

      • Rather than say "little does anyone know," try saying "many are unaware."
      • Corrected sentence: But many are unaware of the pollution this causes."


It is proved that online shopping can released more carbon than buying on foot.

      • "It is proved" should instead be "it has been proven."
      • "Released" should be in the present tense--"release."
      • Rather than say "on foot", try saying "in store."
      • Corrected sentence: It has been proven that online shopping can release more carbon than buying in store.


Due to shipping and fast transportation, many carbon are released into the air.

      • Rather than "many carbon," try saying "excessive amounts of carbon."
      • Corrected sentence: Due to shipping and fast transportation, excessive amounts of carbon are released into the air.


Also clothing can cause more pollution as well.

      • Saying both "also" and "as well" is repetitive. I would drop the "also" in this instance.


Buying new clothes will increase more textile waste.

      • Combine this sentence with the last, since they are short when standing on their own and they are very closely related.
      • Corrected sentence: Also, clothing can cause more pollution; buying new clothes will increase more textile waste.


Overall shopping is enjoyable but be cautious of what you might be releasing in the atmosphere.

      • Rather than say "overall shopping is enjoyable," try saying "while shopping can be enjoyable."
      • Corrected sentence: While shopping can be enjoyable, be cautious of what you might be releasing into the atmosphere.


https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/11/how-black-friday-cyber-monday-impacts-environment/

The Environmental Effects of Black Friday
The day after Thanksgiving is the Black Friday sale that everyone looks forward to. But many are unaware of the pollution this causes. It has been proven that online shopping can release more carbon than buying in store. Due to shipping and fast transportation, excessive amounts of carbon are released into the air. Also, clothing can cause more pollution; buying new clothes will increase more textile waste. While shopping can be enjoyable, be cautious of what you might be releasing into the atmosphere. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/11/how-black-friday-cyber-monday-impacts-environment/

Edited by: Brittni Shoaf


Dry Land
El Salvador is drying up and there is no certain how long the water will last. People there will go to the spring to shower and do their chores. Since the wells don't have enough water, more than 600,000 people have no access to drinking water. If there was water in the wells people will start fighting for it. The problem is none of the country's main rivers can be purified for drinking. This means there will be health problems.

Dry Land

      • Consider changing your title to be more specific. "Dry Land" can mean a broad range of things, but something like "El Salvador is Running Out of Water" catches the reader's interest and provides an idea of what the article is about.


El Salvador is drying up and there is no certain how long the water will last.

      • "No certain" should be replaced with "no way of knowing."
      • Corrected sentence: El Salvador is drying up and there is no way of knowing how long the water will last.


People there will go to the spring to shower and do their chores.

      • Change "will go" to "are going." This puts it into present tense rather than future tense.
      • Corrected sentence: People are going to the spring to shower and do their chores.


Since the wells don't have enough water, more than 600,000 people have no access to drinking water.
If there was water in the wells people will start fighting for it.

      • "If there was water in the wells" flows better if written as "Even if the wells did contain water."
      • Saying "people will start fighting for it" is an assumption, which should be avoided. Instead, say "it is likely that people would fight over it."
      • Corrected sentence: Even if the wells did contain water, it is likely that people would fight over it.


The problem is none of the country's main rivers can be purified for drinking.

      • The word "that" should be inserted after "the problem is."
      • Corrected sentence: The problem is that none of the country's main rivers can be purified for drinking.


This mean there will be health probelms.

      • This sentence could be more powerful with different wording.
      • Since you just used the word "problem" in the previous sentence, try a different word.
      • Corrected sentence: This will almost certainly lead to health consequences.

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/11/el-salvador-water-crisis-drought-climate-change/

El Salvador is Running Out of Water
El Salvador is drying up and there is no way of knowing how long the water will last. People are going to the spring to shower and do their chores. Since the wells don't have enough water, more than 600,000 people have no access to drinking water. Even if the wells did contain water, it is likely that people would fight over it. The problem is that none of the country's main rivers can be purified for drinking. This will almost certainly lead to health consequences.

Edited by: Brittni Shoaf


Technology VS. Humanity

Are we in danger of losing our humanity? In the book Hello World: Being Human in the Age of Algorithms, the author inform us about our so lost humanity near the future with technology. The famous chess champion Gary Kasparov seem unbeatable back in the time. However, IBM built a manchine that can play chess and in 1977 the computer beated the famous chess player Gary Kasparov. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/2018/11/algorithms-big-data-computer-dating-book-talk/

Technology VS. Humanity
Are we in danger of losing our humanity?
In the book Hello World: Being Human in the Age of Algorithms, the author inform us about our so lost humanity near the future with technology.

      • Book titles should be italicized.
      • "Inform" should be "informs."
      • "About our so lost humanity near the future with technology" is a bit confusing. Instead, try "of our loss of humanity with the future of technology."
      • Corrected sentence: In the book Hello World: Being Human in the Age of Algorithms, the author informs us of our loss of humanity with the future of technology.


The famous chess champion Gary Kasparov seem unbeatable back in the time.

      • There should be a comma before and after the name.
      • "Seem unbeatable back in the time" is confusing wording. Instead, try "used to seem unbeatable."
      • Corrected sentence: The famous chess champion, Gary Kasparov, used to seem unbeatable.


However, IBM built a manchine that can play chess and in 1977 the computer beated the famous chess player Gary Kasparov.

      • Corrected the spelling of "machine."
      • There should be a comma after "in 1977."
      • "Beat" is already past tense, so the "-ed" is unnecessary.
      • Since you have already introduced Gary Kasparov as a famous chess player, it is repetitive to do so again. Instead, you can use a simple pronoun--"him."
      • Combine this sentence with the one before using a semicolon, since the two are very closely related.
      • Corrected sentence: The famous chess champion, Gary Kasparov, used to seem unbeatable; however, IBM built a machine that can play chess and in 1977, the computer beat him.


https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/2018/11/algorithms-big-data-computer-dating-book-talk/

Technology VS Humanity
Are we in danger of losing our humanity? In the book Hello World: Being Human in the Age of Algorithms, the author informs us of our loss of humanity with the future of technology. The famous chess champion, Gary Kasparov, used to seem unbeatable; however, IBM built a machine that can play chess and in 1977, the computer beat him.

Edited by: Brittni Shoaf



Thet, for ixl you need to work on definite and indefinite articles, all tenses of verbs, coordinating conjunctions. - Mr. Steve

Volcanoes Eruptions

United States is one of the most volcanic countries in the world. The most dangerous of all listed is the Kilauea in Hawaii. The new volcano threat assessment was updated in 2005 determine the greatest risks of eruption and human impacts. Volcanoes usually give warning when it is about to erupted but if missed, serious consequence can happen. It is important to pay close attention to the warning a volcano give off. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/2018/10/news-most-dangerous-volcanoes-usgs-list-geology/



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Powerful Rulers Of Egypt

Queens in Ancient Egypt hold greater power than most of the other queens. Women in Egypt have all the human rights that we fought for. Women are able to work, owned business, own property, and divorced their husband. Not only that women reuled repeatedly with no interrupted power. With all those rights Egyptian women have the most rights and powers from the very beginning. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/culture/2018/10/queen-princess-royalty-vintage-photos/





All the Way to London

London became the center of attention with many good tourists and beautiful landscapes, London is booming. The Royal Botanic Garden at Kew which lie at Thames, seven miles from central London have the most beautiful greenhouse. Also is home to 1,500 different species of plants. The Shard reign over London is the tallest building and more than 70 new building are coming. With all these site London is one of the most visited cities. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/urban-expeditions/london-population-city-planning/





The Breakthrough of Bicycle

Cycling was known as a sport or a way of transportation. Baron Karl Drais von Sauerbronn made the first practical bicycle with no pedals. In 1839, Scotsman Kirkpatrick MacMillan made an improvement which was later nicknamed as "boneshaker". However, since the wheels were too big, it made it unstable for the riders and led them to crashing. The most popular bicycle design was made by James Starley and it was known as a safety bicycle. Through time, the bicycle has evolved as a means of fun and transportation.





Surprising Attack

A tsunami hit Indonesia without any sign of warning. Many scientists are blaming it geology for this disaster. When the tsunami first hit it was a 6.1 magnitude which barely damage any housing but for unknown reason the tsunami began to grow stronger to a 7.5 magnitude which later on causing huge damage and killing many people. Now everyone is working together to save the remaning people affected by the tsunami. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/09/indonesia-tsunami-sulawesi-explained-science-geology/





Darwin Thoughts

Darwin was the person who believed that species evolve as time and was the first to draw the tree of life. But he later found the third kingdom of life called archaea. However, when he first found out he believed that they are another type of bacteria. Which later on he found out that he was wrong and ended up making a new discovery which was published in the New York Times in 1997. Now there are another kingdom that are found and now scientists are trying to find the relationship between every living things. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/2018/09/darwin-evolution-crispr-microbiome-bacteria-news/





NASA Watching Over

NASA is now able to see the melting glaciers over the world. Thanks to the new satellite, called ICESat-2 which give researchers more precise look of the melting glaciers. This melting ice will cause sea level to rise and the satellite provide a good evidence for that. NASA concluded that the measure of the ice sheet in Antartica and Greenland is about a sixth of an inch. Now NASA coming up with more satellite to determine the amount of vegetation in a region. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/14/climate/nasa-ice-satellite-launch.html?rref=collection%2Fsectioncollection%2Fscience&action=click&contentCollection=science&region=rank&module=package&version=highlights&contentPlacement=8&pgtype=sectionfront





Donating Blood

Donating blood are becoming common, there are four different types of blood: A,B,AB, and O. It is important that the right type of blood to the patients. If not the person will face severe disease or death. But O blood type can be tranfer to any blood type, making it the universal donor blood. Now scientists believed that they can turn the 3 different types of blood types to O by switching the enzymes. Then we don't have to worry about blood transfusion. https://www.popsci.com/type-o-blood-gut-enzyme





Is Arctic Still Cold?

Arctic known as one of the coldest place on earth, might not be as cold as before. Nikita Zimov was teaching his students about ecological fieldwork, when he notice something. THe frozen land might be thawing faster than before. It not possible for a place with 40 degrees below zero Fahrenheit to have soil that are thawing faster. This can lead to major concern about how much carbon are we putting into the air. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/08/news-arctic-permafrost-may-thaw-faster-than-expected/

Is Arctic Still Cold?

      • Don't forget to use your definite and indefinite articles. Though most continents do not use "the", the Northern area of our world is known as "the Arctic"; Is the Arctic Still Cold?

Arctic known as one of the coldest place on earth, might not be as cold as before.

      • Same here: The Arctic, Also the first part of the sentence does not have a verb. You need to add "is". When you use "one of the", you must have the noun as plural, so " One of the places. Lastly, you need to combine both sentences with a conjunction, use "but", and the second part of the sentence does not have a subject, use "it" ; The Arctic is known as one of the coldest places on earth, but it might not be as cold as before.

Nikita Zimov was teaching his students about ecological fieldwork, when he notice something.

      • The verb noticed must be in the past tense because you used "was teaching"

Nikita Zimov was teaching his students about ecological fieldwork, when he noticed something. THe frozen land might be thawing faster than before.

      • Watch out for capitalizing words that don't need it, if you do this in school they take points off for mechanics based on sloppiness. Also try not to end to many sentences with prepositions. You've done this twice with the word " before". It is incorrect to use a preposition at the end of a sentence.; The frozen land might be thawing faster than it has in the past.

It not possible for a place with 40 degrees below zero Fahrenheit to have soil that are thawing faster.

      • Do not start a sentence with "it" because using it makes the subject unclear. Soil is an uncountable noun so you should not use the plural be verb "are", use is. When you use an adjective in the comparative form (more or er), then you need another noun to compare it to. So, just write "as fast as it is."; For a place with 40 degrees below zero Fahrenheit weather to have soil that thaws as fast as it is, something else must be happening.

Though the cause is not clear, concerns about how much carbon we are putting into the air has come up as a possible cause.





Can Human Kill Robot?

It hard to turn down the offer when a robot is begging not to. Scientists chose students from 89 colleges to team up and work on a robot called Noa. The challenge started with the scientists asked the students to turn of the robot. This create stress due to the robot begging not to since their relationship began to built up. Scientists believed that the students treat the robot as a human after having it as a partner. https://www.popsci.com/humans-killing-robots





Why Elephant Have Low Risk of Cancer

One of the biggest mammal should be more prone to cancer risk than smaller animals. But, elephant have fewer risk of having cancer than humans. This is because of their trunk, which have extra tumor-suppressing gene called P53, while human only have one, elephant have 20. The gene can detect DNA damage and is able to kill it. Since elephant have more P53 than human, it is more likely that elephant have a lower chance of having skin problems than humans. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/2018/08/news-cancer-elephants-genes-dna-new-research/





Seafood

If human population continue to boom, the food production need to be double from now. So now researchers are now focusing on fish, as fish have high enough of proteins. Now researchers are considering high sea fishing which is very expensive. They also came up with another solution, having farm-raised fish. Perdicting that by 2030, 62% of the world's seafood will be farm-raised. So far there is no real solution for food production besides depending on seafood. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/08/news-fisheries-aquaculture-food-security/





Health Issues

Ever since Trump became president, having a insurence become challenging. Medicare played an important role for everyone, especially for elders. Having insurence can lower medicial bills and make medication more affordable. But recently Trump cut out all the benefits and the $500 billion fund. Now affording medication is harder due to no insurence to help and now 70% of older Americans suffer from periodontal disease and 20% live with decay tooth. So medicare is needed, especailly for the elders. https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2018/jun/26/the-future-of-medicare-dental-vision-and-hearing-c/





Soil Causing More Carbon Dioxide

After trees die, microbes in the soil consume the carrbon and exhale out the carbon dioxide back into the air. Temperature rising can cause this process to speed up much faster. The microbes are able to break down more carbon due to high heat which later extracted to the atmosphere. To prevent this from happening, we can perserve or regrow forest. But this won't be enough compare to other damages that happened. https://www.popsci.com/rising-temperatures-are-causing-soil-to-dump-more-carbon-dioxide-into-air#page-5






Poisioning Wildlife

Two herdsmen in Kenya's Osewan region had enough of the trouble the lions has cause to his livestocks. So they went and decided to make poison darts in which they killed one female and a male. But this didn't stop the predators, so then they began to poison their livestocks in order to kill the lions. The people only use poison to catch preys for food and to protect themselves. Now wildlife animals are decreasing as time pass due to humans. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/magazine/2018/08/poisoning-africa-kenya-maasai-pesticides-lions-poachers-conservationists/





How Much Are You Consuming?

Athletes and trainers have a belief on consuming alot of proteins when they exercise. That is usually not the case, body need protein to break up into amino acids, which are used to make other proteins like collagen. But too much protein can be bad for the kidneys. So eating too much protein don't really improve your strength but strain your kidneys. In general, the amount of proteins you need to consume have to do with how much you exercise. So it is important to watch your intake on proteins and also to eat other nutrients. https://www.popsci.com/how-much-protein#page-4





No More Plastic 

By the January 2019, Dominica plans on fully banning all platic and styrofoam use food containers. The government restrict on the imports of non-biodegradable containers. Dominica have much larger goals, they also hoped to have a stable climate. Since in summer there are many migrating sperm whales inhabitants. So reducing plastic waste can also protect the marine mammals.

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/environment/2018/08/news-dominica-plastic-styrofoam-ban/





DNA Connection

Dogs are known as men best friend for it well-behaved behaviors. But dogs are descended from wolves so, how are dogs tameable. So researchers believed that breeding the friendliest fox can domesticate them. Belyaev proved himself right by breeding fearless foxes which resulted a socialable and adventerous babies. Now researchers still kept on breeding 40 generations of friendly and aggressive foxes to find the connection of the genetic that made it wild to tame. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2018/08/fox-dogs-wild-tame-genetics-study-news/





Grizzly Bear Survival Rate

Grizzly bear had been in the endangered species list. Since then researchers have been collecting data from bears for the future species. After the recovery of the popluation, the government began to open up hunting ground for the bears. But if the hunter kill a female bear and the popluation decreases, then the hunting ground will be closed. So far there are about 700 bears in the Greater Yellowstone Area and 1,000 wander in the remote mountains and valleys. https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/2018/07/can-grizzly-bears-survive-hunting-animals/





Jupiter's New Moon: Weirdo

Jupiter has 53 moons in total founded by Galileo Galilei backed in 1610. But 16 of those weren't named and the two that were discovered last year make it 69 moons in total. The most recent discoveres is finding 10 more moons to make it 79 moons in total. Out of the 79 moons each of the moons were put into a group. Out of the 12 moons one of the moon wasn't orbiting like the rest of the moons. Many scientists believed that once the moon was collided with something, since it function a bit differently. Being different from the rest of the moons, scientists named it Weirdo.





Parasite Alert!

Toxoplasama gondii is a cat poop parasite that have both infected not just humans but other rodents as well. T. gondii would likely infected warm blooded animals that come to close contact. Causing it to have less fears, for example, infecting a mouse would cause it to have less fear of cats. Getting infected will change one judgement, personality, and mental health. Researchers also found that many people who are infected will choose career that is challenging and risky.





U.S. Is Vulnerable to Big Disasters

Locations is one main reasons why disasters occures. Seven of the 10 largest areas in U.S. are near to the coast and more than 60 million people live there. Another factors is over-population since it hard to fit many people in one small spaceand city need advanced infrastructure for houses. Next, factors is no emergancy funds in case if money is needed.Last factors is limited amount of supplies, since most of our supplies are mostly imported, it is important to have enough supplies when needed. In order to protected for big disasters we need everything listed be prepared.





Fire vs. Animals

Fire can destoryed just about anything especailly in a forest. Animals have the abilities to escape the heat, for example, birds will fly, mammals will run, amphibians will burrow underground, and elks and other animals will stay in stream and lakes. Having a forest fire can benefit predators who pray on fleeing animals. Not much animals are harmed by the fire while there are some death but not a severed amount ever recorded. After the fire life in the forest will revive and new live began.





Thet's Article Page Shakes Extinction

      • A proper title is missing from this article, which is important to reinforce the main idea of your article. Consider trying a more relevant title: " Hazards of Shark Overfishing".


Shakes all around the world are trageted for one thing and it is its liver, known as squalene.

      • Various misspellings- "shakes" and "trageted should be "sharks" and "targeted". Furthermore, the phrase "one thing and it is" is excessive. Try using a more straightforward and concise wording: " Sharks throughout the world are targeted specifically for their livers." Also, the term "squalene' refers to the organic compound itself obtained from shark liver oil, not the liver itself. And thus the sentence should read: "Sharks throughout the world are targeted specifically for their liver oils, which possess both commercial and health value. This helps in transitioning to the next sentence as well."


Squalene contains specail oil that is essential for moisturizing and have many nutrients that is good for your skin.

      • As noted earlier, squalene refers to the organic compound found in shark liver oil. Therefore, it does not contain the oil, and is within the oil. The sentence should read: " The squalene found in shark liver oil.." The phrase "have many nutrients..." is using the wrong tense. The word "have" should be replaced with has". Altogether, it should sound like this: " The squalene found in shark liver oil is an exceptional moisturizer, and has many nutrients that is beneficial for your skin.


People used the squalene and used it to produce make-up, lipsticks, loions, and sunscreens.

      • When discussing events that are still ongoing, use present tense instead of past tense. Replace "used" with use". In addition, the word "people" is vague and does not specify any specific group, thus making it applicable to all people. Use "companies" or "entrepreneurs" to fix this issue. Subsequently, to clarify the sentence even further, categorize the products listed that squalene is used in. In whole, the sentence should read: "In fact, companies utilize squalene in various health and beauty products, such as make-up, lipsticks, lotions, and sunscreens." The transition "in fact" helps to link your sentences together and streamline the ideas.


But not only were the sharks targeted for oils but for seafood known as shark fin soup mostly served in China.

      • This sentence is run-on, and sounds clunky and disorganized. Use a better transition word to illustrate a shift in topic and use commas when necessary to fix this issue, or consider dividing the sentence into two parts: "However, sharks are not only overfished for their oils. Sharks are commonly used in seafood dishes such as the infamous shark fin soup, served primarily in China."


As more and more sharks are fished the harder for the sharks to reproduce and harder for them to grow.

      • Commas are missing from this sentence, making it run-on. Additionally, the phrase "sharks to reproduce and harder for them to grow" can be compacted to make it sound less wordy: " As sharks are continually overfished, it becomes more difficult for sharks to reproduce and grow."


This can lead to extinction to some species of sharks.

      • Leading this sentence with the word "this" sounds bland and lacking. Try using words/phrases such as "As a result," or " Due to this,", which indicates a conclusion or consequence: "As a result, some species of sharks are approaching extinction."


Full Edited Article: Sharks throughout the world are targeted specifically for their liver oils, which possess both commercial and health value. The squalene found in shark liver oil is an exceptional moisturizer, and has many nutrients that is beneficial for your skin. In fact, companies utilize squalene in various health and beauty products, such as make-up, lipsticks, lotions, and sunscreens. However, sharks are not only overfished for their oils. They are commonly used in seafood dishes such as the infamous shark fin soup, served primarily in China. As sharks are continually overfished, it becomes more difficult for sharks to reproduce and grow. As a result, some species of sharks are approaching extinction.




Jupiter's New Moon: Weirdo

Jupiter has 53 moons in total founded by Galileo Galilei backed in 1610. But 16 of those weren't named and the two that were discovered last year make it 69 moons in total. The most recent discoveres is finding 10 more moons to make it 79 moons in total. Out of the 79 moons each of the moons were put into a group. Out of the 12 moons one of the moon wasn't orbiting like the rest of the moons. Many scientists believed that once the moon was collided with something, since it function a bit differently. Being different from the rest of the moons, scientists named it Weirdo.





Parasite Alert!

Toxoplasama gondii is a cat poop parasite that have both infected not just humans but other rodents as well. T. gondii would likely infected warm blooded animals that come to close contact. Causing it to have less fears, for example, infecting a mouse would cause it to have less fear of cats. Getting infected will change one judgement, personality, and mental health. Researchers also found that many people who are infected will choose career that is challenging and risky.





U.S. Is Vulnerable to Big Disasters

Locations is one main reasons why disasters occures. Seven of the 10 largest areas in U.S. are near to the coast and more than 60 million people live there. Another factors is over-population since it hard to fit many people in one small spaceand city need advanced infrastructure for houses. Next, factors is no emergancy funds in case if money is needed.Last factors is limited amount of supplies, since most of our supplies are mostly imported, it is important to have enough supplies when needed. In order to protected for big disasters we need everything listed be prepared.





Fire vs. Animals

Fire can destoryed just about anything especailly in a forest. Animals have the abilities to escape the heat, for example, birds will fly, mammals will run, amphibians will burrow underground, and elks and other animals will stay in stream and lakes. Having a forest fire can benefit predators who pray on fleeing animals. Not much animals are harmed by the fire while there are some death but not a severed amount ever recorded. After the fire life in the forest will revive and new live began.