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'''Bold text'''Meku's Writing Page
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'''Meku's Writing Page'''
  
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<br><br>The main reason for why the Eastern Tiger Salamanders are reappearing in Maryland is  that their breeding habitats are being restored on the several wetland areas through extensive Vegetation management in Maryland.  The elements needed to be in a egg laying place for a female Eastern Tiger Salamander are fish less  freshwater ponds,  lot of sunlight , and up right vegetation.
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<br><br>'''Medhir! DO NOT DELETE YOUR WRITINGS!!! YOUR editor doesn't know what to do!'''
  
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I could’t find the second reason.
 
  
  
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The main reason for why the Eastern Tiger Salamanders are reappearing in Maryland is  that their breeding habitats are being restored on the several wetland areas through extensive Vegetation management in Maryland.
 
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***Edited for word choice and fluidity and capitalization: The main reason that Eastern Tiger Salamanders are reappearing in Maryland is that their breeding habitats are being restored on several wetlands through extensive vegetation management.
 
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***Never follow "reason" with "why" because it is repetitive. Instead, use "the reason that... is that." No need for "the" before "several wetland areas" if you already use "several" to describe the areas. No need to capitalize "vegetation." Also don't need to write "in Maryland" at the end since you already mention it in the beginning of the sentence.
 
  
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<br>The elements needed to be in a egg laying place for a female Eastern Tiger Salamander are fish less  freshwater ponds,  lot of sunlight , and up right vegetation.
 
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***Edited for fluidity and word choice: The elements needed in a place for female Eastern Tiger Salamanders to lay eggs in include fishless, freshwater ponds, abundant sunlight, and upright vegetation.
 
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***It sounds clearer if you format the first half of the sentence differently. "Fishless" is one word. Comma between "fishless" and "freshwater" because both describe "ponds." Switch "lot of sunlight" to "abundant sunlight" → sounds more academic. "Upright" is one word.
 
  
  
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'''Final Edited Version:'''
 
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The main reason that Eastern Tiger Salamanders are reappearing in Maryland is that their breeding habitats are being restored on several wetlands through extensive vegetation management. The elements needed in a place for female Eastern Tiger Salamanders to lay eggs in include fishless, freshwater ponds, abundant sunlight, and upright vegetation.
 
  
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***Not bad! However, please write more sentences in the future. Even if you can't find a second reason, you can explain more about the importance of their reappearance; draw out more information from your text. Focus on your spelling and commas.
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What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said, “Teddy is right: there's something in the child.”  is that Nat "the child" is really talented at playing the violin.  I say this because when Nat played the violin everybody in the room who were talking stopped talking to listen to Nat play his violin.  Then after the Nat played a little violin the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.
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What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said, “Teddy is right: there's something in the child.”  is that Nat "the child" is really talented at playing the violin.
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***Edited for punctuation: What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said “Teddy is right: there's something in the child”  is that Nat, "the child," is really talented at playing the violin.
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***Since your sentence does not end with the quote, don't put the period. You can directly remove the comma and period around the quote. Add commas around "the child."
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<br>I say this because when Nat played the violin everybody in the room who were talking stopped talking to listen to Nat play his violin.
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***Edited for punctuation and fludiity: I say this because when Nat played the violin, everybody in the room stopped talking to listen to Nat play.
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***Add a comma after "violin." Condense some repetitive parts.
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<br>Then after the Nat played a little violin the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.
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***Edited for fluidity: After Nat played for a while, the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.
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***Replace "a little violin" ith "for a while" (since you're talking about time). Remove "Then."
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'''Final Edited Version:
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What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said “Teddy is right: there's something in the child”  is that Nat, "the child," is really talented at playing the violin. I say this because when Nat played the violin, everybody in the room stopped talking to listen to Nat play. After Nat played for a while, the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.
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***Overall, good job! Please focus on your punctuation (comma/periods).
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Edited by Ashley Leung
 
Edited by Ashley Leung

Latest revision as of 05:27, 2 June 2020

Meku's Writing Page



Medhir! DO NOT DELETE YOUR WRITINGS!!! YOUR editor doesn't know what to do! 







What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said, “Teddy is right: there's something in the child.”  is that Nat "the child" is really talented at playing the violin.  I say this because when Nat played the violin everybody in the room who were talking stopped talking to listen to Nat play his violin.  Then after the Nat played a little violin the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.


What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said, “Teddy is right: there's something in the child.” is that Nat "the child" is really talented at playing the violin.

      • Edited for punctuation: What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said “Teddy is right: there's something in the child” is that Nat, "the child," is really talented at playing the violin.
      • Since your sentence does not end with the quote, don't put the period. You can directly remove the comma and period around the quote. Add commas around "the child."


I say this because when Nat played the violin everybody in the room who were talking stopped talking to listen to Nat play his violin.

      • Edited for punctuation and fludiity: I say this because when Nat played the violin, everybody in the room stopped talking to listen to Nat play.
      • Add a comma after "violin." Condense some repetitive parts.


Then after the Nat played a little violin the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.

      • Edited for fluidity: After Nat played for a while, the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.
      • Replace "a little violin" ith "for a while" (since you're talking about time). Remove "Then."


Final Edited Version: What Mrs. Bhaer meant when she said “Teddy is right: there's something in the child” is that Nat, "the child," is really talented at playing the violin. I say this because when Nat played the violin, everybody in the room stopped talking to listen to Nat play. After Nat played for a while, the children and Ms. Bhaer all went to the piano room to play a song together.


      • Overall, good job! Please focus on your punctuation (comma/periods).


Edited by Ashley Leung