The World for Freedom

Revision as of 20:06, 8 April 2020

Reasons why Tiger Salamanders are coming back to Maryland

Tiger salamanders come back to Maryland for many reasons. To begin with, Maryland's Eastern shore is a great place for vegetation management and it is a good natural breeding habitat for the salamanders. The story states "Maryland's Eastern Shore, where extensive vegetation management over the past decade helped restore natural breeding habitats of these salamanders." To clarify, the Eastern tiger salamanders went back to Maryland for this reason. To add on, the estimated population of salamanders is very large. The story also states "How are Eastern tiger salamanders populations doing in Maryland?... population estimate would be 1,000 to 2,000 individual tiger salamanders." To clarify, salamanders are probably commonly seen in Maryland near the Eastern shore. All in all, Tiger salamanders were gone from Maryland but made a comeback!

Super moons are different from regular moons that we see. First off, the supermoon is the closest moon in history unlike a regular moon.. In the text it states, "On April 7, 2020, the moon will be about 221,773 miles (356,909 km) away from Earth. This is just a few hundred miles further than the November 2016 Super moon, which at 221,524 miles (356,508 km), was the closest distance we have experienced in recent history." This shows, that the super moon is more closer than the average moon, and is the closest moon ever in history unlike the regular moon we see every night.Also, super moon is bigger and brighter than an average moon. The text says, "Super moons, which are usually about seven percent bigger and 15 percent brighter than the average full moon,"This shows that the super moon is more brighter and is larger than the usual moon we see every night. In conclusion, this is how the super moon is different than the regular moon.

****"'Don't forget your title!"'
The 2020 Supermoon

Super moons are different from regular moons that we see.
**** "'This is good, but we still need some more introduction. If you were to go up to someone and say, "Supermoons are different from regular moons that we see." they would be confused and probably ask you why you're telling them that. So it's helpful if you put something else that will add some context to your topic. Also, make sure that you make "Supermoon" one word."'
Tonight, on April 7, 2020, there will be a Supermoon. Supermoons are different from regular moons that we usually see in the night sky.

First off, the supermoon is the closest moon in history unlike a regular moon..
**** "'Here, we need to make sure that Supermoon is capitalized because it is a proper noun. Also make sure you're using only one period (I bet that was probably just an accident though). I also changed this sentence a bit because saying "the supermoon is the closest moon" doesn't really make sense because the reader doesn't know what you mean it's the closest to (is it the closest moon to Mars? To Venus? To McDonald's?)."'
Unlike a regular moon, the Supermoon is closer to Earth.

In the text it states, "On April 7, 2020, the moon will be about 221,773 miles (356,909 km) away from Earth. This is just a few hundred miles further than the November 2016 Super moon, which at 221,524 miles (356,508 km), was the closest distance we have experienced in recent history."
****"'I edited this sentence just a little bit to give it a smoother flow."'
The text says that this Supermoon "will be about 221, 773 miles (356, 909 km) away from Earth. This is just a few hundred miles further than the November 2016 Supermoon, which at 221, 524 miles (356, 508 km) was the closest distance we have experienced in recent history."

This shows, that the super moon is more closer than the average moon, and is the closest moon ever in history unlike the regular moon we see every night.Also, super moon is bigger and brighter than an average moon. The text says, "Super moons, which are usually about seven percent bigger and 15 percent brighter than the average full moon,"This shows that the super moon is more brighter and is larger than the usual moon we see every night.
**** "'I edited a lot of this chunk, just because there was a lot that you could go ahead and get rid of. For the first sentence, the reader knows now after the quote and what you've already said that this moon is a lot closer and unlike the moons we usually see. As far as the next sentence, the quote, and the sentence after that, you can put that all into one smooth sentence. Grammar note: saying "more closer" is incorrect. The word "more" is a modifier, meaning that it kind of changes the meaning of a word. At the same time, the suffix "er" does about the same thing. So I could say that I am "more hungry" or I am "hungrier" - both of those mean the same thing. However, you can only use one at a time. So in this context, you would just say that the moon is CLOSER."'
The Supermoon is also "seven percent bigger and 15 percent brighter than the average full moon,".

In conclusion, this is how the super moon is different than the regular moon.
****"'This sentence is almost the same as your opening sentence, so we need to change that. It's good to tie the end to the beginning, but they don't have to sound totally the same."'
Supermoons aren't like the moons we usually see, go outside and see it tonight!
****"'Also remember to add your source!"'

The 2020 Supermoon Tonight, on April 7, 2020, there will be a Supermoon. Supermoons are different from regular moons that we usually see in the night sky. Unlike a regular moon, the Supermoon is closer to Earth. The text says that this Supermoon "will be about 221, 773 miles (356, 909 km) away from Earth. This is just a few hundred miles further than the November 2016 Supermoon, which at 221, 524 miles (356, 508 km) was the closest distance we have experienced in recent history." The Supermoon is also "seven percent bigger and 15 percent brighter than the average full moon,". Supermoons aren't like the moons we usually see, go outside and see it tonight!

• • • • "'This was good! Keep up the good work and make sure you're reading my suggestions. If you need to, don't be afraid to read back over your work for errors or things you might have missed! You've got this!"'

Edited by Lainey Morris

Social distancing(cons and pros)

There are both negative and positive reasons for practicing social distancing. One positive reason why you should practice social distancing is so you can limit the spread of COVID-19 According to the text it states, "To limit the spread of the coronavirus that causes COVID-19, health experts say people should practice social distancing".This shows that social distancing can sometimes prevent people from getting the virus.  A negative reason why you shouldn't practice social distancing is because even being 6 feet away can also spread germs. According to the text it states, "To limit the spread of the coronavirus that causes COVID-19, health experts say people should practice social distancing. In the text it also states,"Even standing 6 feet apart from one another, people can spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes. To elaborate, social distancing can still result to spread of the virus.All in all, this is why it is negative and positive for practicing social distancing.

Social distancing(cons and pros)
****"'Yay! This is a great title for this paragraph! I'm just going to tweak it a tad and swap "cons and pros" for "pros and cons"; also, always make sure you capitalize the words in your title!"'
Social Distancing: Pros and Cons

There are both negative and positive reasons for practicing social distancing. 

****"'This is a good sentence about the main topic of your paragraph; however, we still need to introduce it a little bit more. Imagine that you're writing this paragraph for someone who lives on Mars. They have no idea what the coronavirus or social distancing are! Explain what social distancing is first, and then discuss how it has pros and cons."'
Due to the outbreak of COVID-19, people are being advised to practice social distancing. Social distancing includes things like "avoiding mass gatherings" and "maintaining distance" in order to keep COVID-19 from spreading even more. This new practice is helpful, but is found to have both positive and negative effects.
One positive reason why you should practice social distancing is so you can limit the spread of COVID-19 According to the text it states, "To limit the spread of the coronavirus that causes COVID-19, health experts say people should practice social distancing".This shows that social distancing can sometimes prevent people from getting the virus.
****"'I lumped all three of these sentences together because I think they can all be put into one shorter sentence. All three of these sentences are saying essentially the same thing. Instead, you can summarize all of this in one sentence."'
According to the text, social distancing can sometimes prevent people from getting the virus.

A negative reason why you shouldn't practice social distancing is because even being 6 feet away can also spread germs.
****"'One thing here is that instead of "6" you should type out "six". A good rule of thumb is that if the number is between smaller than 10, you will write out the whole word, but if it is 10 or bigger, you just type the digits (six vs. 26). Also, I think you got confused with the message of this article and prompt - you should still socially distance! Doctors and scientists and government leaders still are urging everyone to socially distance. You're just trying to find reasons why social distancing might be negative (for example, you can't go to your friends' houses anymore to hang out)."'

According to the text it states, "To limit the spread of the coronavirus that causes COVID-19, health experts say people should practice social distancing. In the text it also states,"Even standing 6 feet apart from one another, people can spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes.
****"'In the sentence before this one you say the same thing that you quote in this sentence, so instead, push them both together to make one sentence."'
The text also says that "Even standing fix feet apart from one another, people can spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes."

To elaborate, social distancing can still result to spread of the virus.All in all, this is why it is negative and positive for practicing social distancing.
****"'I didn't write anything else after this part, just because I think you were confused on the assignment."'

Social Distancing: Pros and Cons Due to the outbreak of COVID-19, people are being advised to practice social distancing. Social distancing includes things like "avoiding mass gatherings" and "maintaining distance" in order to keep COVID-19 from spreading even more. This new practice is helpful, but is found to have both positive and negative effects. According to the text, social distancing can sometimes prevent people from getting the virus. The text also says that "Even standing fix feet apart from one another, people can spread the virus through droplets from coughs and sneezes." Luckily, social distancing can limit that from happening.

• • • • "'Okay, this paragraph was a little on the short side. I didn't want to add in extra to compensate for things you left out, because I want you to be able to write things on your own. I'm only here to help you learn how to polish your writing, not do it for you. I could also tell that you maybe didn't understand the prompt of this assignment; you were supposed to find the positive and negative effects of social distancing, not the positive and negative reasons. You did well in finding a positive, which is limiting the spread of coronavirus, but for your negative, you said that you shouldn't practice social distancing. Instead, you should've been looking for ways that social distancing can be negative; for example, people can't go out and see their friends and family right now because of social distancing, and that's making many people sad. That's a negative effect of social distancing. If you're ever confused on an assignment, don't be afraid to ask someone for help or email your teacher!"'

Edited by Lainey Morris

There are some ways students can learn best while studying online.To begin with they can move distractions away from them.In the text it states"Remove any distractions from the space, and if possible, make it separate from your bed or sofa. A clear distinction between where you study and where you take breaks can help you focus."To clarify,moving distractions can help you focus.To add on,friends can help you.The text says" Saying or thinking what you’re going to do may not be enough to complete the work you have set for yourself. Sometimes telling your friends about the h.w., projects, classes, or courses you’re taking help keep you to completing them as well as posting achievements to your social media accounts. Having a community and support network of friends and family to cheer you on makes a difference."To elaborate,its good sharing what you finished.In short,these are some of the ways students can learn best while studying online.

I went ahead and added a title since you didn't have one.
How to Learn Best During Online Studying

There are some ways students can learn best while studying online.
This is a good opener for what you're going to talk about, but you still need a little more of an introduction to the topic.
Studying online can be a challenge for students, but there are many ways to still learn well while working from home.

To begin with they can move distractions away from them.In the text it states"Remove any distractions from the space, and if possible, make it separate from your bed or sofa.
Make sure that you're putting space between the end of each sentence (ex. "...away from them. In the text..." instead of "...away from them.In the text.."). Since these two sentences are saying the same thing, go ahead and combine them to make it flow better.
The texts recommends that you "Remove any distractions from the space, and if possible, make it separate from your bed or sofa."

A clear distinction between where you study and where you take breaks can help you focus."
I took this part of the quotation out so that you could include more of your words and work on summarizing. So, instead of just putting the quote, you can write in your own words what you have read.
Separating the study space from the place where you relax can be helpful in focusing.

To clarify,moving distractions can help you focus.
Since your paragraph is about ways to help students focus and do well in online classes, we can assume that the reader has realized that moving the distractions can help you focus, so you don't need this sentence. Instead of saying things like "to clarify" in a new sentence, you can just add more details in a new sentence in the future.

To add on,friends can help you.The text says" Saying or thinking what you’re going to do may not be enough to complete the work you have set for yourself. Sometimes telling your friends about the h.w., projects, classes, or courses you’re taking help keep you to completing them as well as posting achievements to your social media accounts.
Again, make sure you're separating the ends of your sentences, and watch where you have quotations (make sure it's directly against the first word inside the quotations: "Saying..." instead of " Saying...")! Since this quote is kind of long, I took it out and used that as another opportunity to summarize and combine sentences.
The text also mentions that friends and social media accounts can be helpful, saying that telling them about any sort of school responsibilities you have is useful in holding you accountable and making sure you're completing your tasks.

Having a community and support network of friends and family to cheer you on makes a difference."
Having a strong support network like this can make a big difference in success, and sharing what you've accomplished is a useful way to encourage good work.

To elaborate,its good sharing what you finished.In short,these are some of the ways students can learn best while studying online.
Make sure that you leave space between a comma and the following word ("elaborate, it's..." instead of "elaborate,it's") and still make sure you're keeping sentences separate! You've done a good job elaborating on why friends and social media are useful for doing well in online classes, so the first sentence here isn't necessary. Lastly, good job using transitional phrases! However, your concluding sentence is almost identical to your opening sentence. Make sure your concluding sentence wraps up your paragraph without directly quoting the beginning. If your concluding sentence is good enough, you won't even need a phrase like "in short"!
For students everywhere, studying online is new and maybe challenging, but there are still many steps that we can take to learn well while working online.

How to Learn Best During Online Studying

Studying online can be a challenge for students, but there are many ways to still learn well while working from home. The texts recommends that you "Remove any distractions from the space, and if possible, make it separate from your bed or sofa." Separating the study space from the place where you relax can be helpful in focusing. The text also mentions that friends and social media accounts can be helpful, saying that telling them about any sort of school responsibilities you have is useful in holding you accountable and making sure you're completing your tasks. Having a strong support network like this can make a big difference in succes. s, and sharing what you've accomplished is a useful way to encourage good work. For students everywhere, studying online is new and maybe challenging, but there are still many steps that we can take to learn well while working online.

I can see you using transitional phrases and using quotes from what you've read - great job! Just make sure you're separating your sentences and be careful of your quotation placement. It can be helpful to read back over what you've written to check for any careless errors. This is a good start, keep working hard! Edited by Lainey Morris